Yesterday I had a couple of instances that felt very #FakingWell; one where I walked without support and one where I used my cane. Someone asked me if using my cane felt better or worse than using my wheelchair and another asked if me walking (rather than using my wheelchair) meant that I was doing “better”.
The answers to those questions are both a little complicated.
Q1: Overall, using my wheelchair is the safest and most comfortable way for me to move around, and the ONLY way I can move for long distances or periods of time. I use my cane in very specific settings, where it logistically feels easier for me to use it.
Inaccessible spaces can include homes or large gatherings where even if a space is architecturally accessible, the event makes it difficult; if there is a large crowd, sometimes low lighting, I can have a difficult time navigating the space in my wheelchair, the crowds become a tremendous obstacle to getting around.
I also have a lot of difficulty hearing people from down in my chair, so using my cane (which turns into a high seat in case seating in not available) allows for an easier experience in those regards.
Q2: Technically I don’t get “better”, I will always have #EDS, but I do have some days or moments that are more stable than others.
If I am using my cane, it means two things, that the specific environmental circumstances allow it and I don’t have any current severe injuries, just pain and fragility. It takes a lot of work to be able to do it; I have to focus hard on my major joints like my ankles, knees, and hips. I have to concentrate on keeping my muscles tense in order to try and hold my legs together, this is uncomfortable, painful, and risky, I can only do it in short bursts.
My wheelchair is the safest and least painful way for me to move around and a lot of spaces and circumstances make me feel like putting my body at risk is the ~easier~ option. Each mobility aid has it’s pros and cons for me in regards to accessibility and the impacts on my body and experience.
[Image Description: Annie sits in a seat from a monochrome living room set wearing a black jacket, two knees braces, and holding her cane.] (at HGAB)
https://www.instagram.com/p/BtUgzlKHKsE/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=brkorviezbu4
